It's been almost a year since I lost track.
It's been almost a year if self abuse
It's been almost a year of avoidance
It's been almost a year since I stopped taking care of myself.
It's been almost a month since I started to feel a slight change in my head.
I have been doing a bit more sewing this last few weeks trying to get back into it. It has been somewhat frustrating but it's starting to be fun again.
I have missed that feeling.
I have Missed being proud of my ideas, creations, myself!
I feel myself pulling back now.
Once again I have the desire to do better, learn more, hone my skills.
I am starting to crave that feeling of accomplishment that comes with creating, organizing, rebuilding.
I might even be feeling the urge to do a little excercise. Get myself moving again. I am not overly worried about losing weight anymore but I am going to cook healthier meals and cut out some of the snacking we do.
I also know I need to start writing again. For me. I know how important it is for me to express myself to try and sort through some of this baggage I carry with me on the daily. I don't want to go to a therapist so I need to do what I can do to work through some of this inner turmoil and confusion so I can be the best me possible
It may not always be overly thought provoking stuff but I know that there are lessons in the most mundane things.
My goal is to capture my days, ideas, memories, thoughts, magic.
Its been almost a year since I felt like me.
I don't want to loose me again